Posts Tagged ‘ venting ’

in which… I vent on Valentine’s

I need to vent.

Valentine’s Day, right? It’s coming up on the calendar. And I have a serious issue that needs to be dealt with. Right here. Right now.

Girls love Valentine’s Day. Everyone knows this. Girls love to have a Valentine. Everyone also knows this. Girls with a Valentine, like to get Valentine gifts from their Valentine. Fact. [Guys? If you haven’t caught on yet… you are in trouble]

Now I’ll address my issue. Any store prepped for Valentine’s day is decked in red foil covered chocolate and roses out the you know what, and a big thing this year are those cutsie little baskets filled with everything from candy [from the young Valentine] to expensive chocolate and wine [from the serious Valentine] to cheesy stuffed bears that sing “L-O-V-E” [from the last-minute-gift Valentine].

But ladies, I have an issue with these cutsie baskets and pre-made gifts. And you should too.

They send out a terrible message.

They tell the men that we don’t care that they spent ZERO time on our Valentines gift! They tell them that it’s ok to grab up a pre-made basket and pretend they spent time and effort on our precious Valentine’s Day! They tell the men that it doesn’t matter that 10,000 other women will be getting the exact same dancing bear, because, ‘honey, the fact that you picked this out especially for me is what makes it so great!’ *insert coy smile*

No! This is so wrong! Ladies! Do you realize, that when he brings you that pre-made plastic basket of expensive heart-shaped chocolates, the underlying message is, “Babe, you mean as much to me as $15 dollars of corn syrup and red food coloring.”

Don’t you see how commercialism is destroying our day?!

And now… your turn.

Gentlemen! *ahem* Would you all please stop acting like little girls, man up, and show the girl you care by doing something other than spending $15 on a monkey that sings “Wild Thing”? I mean come on! Quit slacking off because it’s easier. I know you all hate Valentine’s Day. [Honestly, is there a holiday that saps more masculinity than Valentine’s? I think not…] But seriously, just hold your breath and do something sweet for her. Quit relying on Wal-Mart to get a gift that shows what she means to you. Cook dinner for her. Write her a song. Take her to the place you met! Go dancing. Do something you hate, but know she loves. Buy sundae stuff and watch her favorite movie. [Even if it’s a chick flick. Suck it up] Pick her a bouquet. [Taking the time to pick them shows more love than any perfumed rose] Make a list of everything you love about her. Get her tickets for two to see her favorite play, or show, or band. Make her a playlist of every song that reminds you of her. The choices are, literally, endless.

We know it’s nearly impossible to do something for Valentine ’s Day that’s macho…

But can’t you see? That’s why we love it so much when you do something sweet for us. There is nothing sweeter than a man taking the time to let his girl know that she matters more than his pride.

So this year, for the sake of every girl in the world, please put a little bit of thought, time, and effort into your Valentine’s gift.

And so ends my Valentine vent.